But I digress Mr Hanks, I must return to last night. As I sat watching you on 'the telly' I couldn't help but be saddened by the passing of your on screen co star, Mr Paul Newman. I thought of his delicious, yet charitable sauce, the world famous Paul Newman's Salad Dressing. Oh how I weept the first time I went to the supermarket after his death. I clutched his beautiful condiment in my sweaty hands and weeped on my knees in the bread aisle. They should have made the screw tops black after Mr Newman passed as a mark of respect to the man's singular acting talents and his panache for a good light dressing.
This brings me neatly to my point Mr Hanks, or may I call you Tom. No let us not be so presumptious. So Mr Hanks, I think the world has seen what your acting has to offer, but what keeps me awake at night is what do Mr Tom Hank's taste buds desire? Most importantly, when you are at a fancy Hollywood bash with the great and the good, which dipping sauce do you go for?
This question could be answered with your very own range of Tom Hanks Dipping Sauces! We would all rest easy knowing we could go to our supermarkets and be able to purchase hand selected dipping sauces for our 'We Love To Hanks parties' picked and produced by the man himself!!! I can see the strap line now...
'The Everyman actor, produces the dipping sauce for every occassion!'
If you could email me your favourites and then we can start work on getting this new and exclusive line of condiments onto the market. We'll need some old traditional favourites and some sauces with a twist. I'm thinking a ginger and coriander pesto number might be a good starting point and have them hankering for more. No pun intended...
We can decide on the names later, and then I think we should move into meat products, I know many people that would love to get their hands on a Lamb Hanks! I look forward to hearing from you and have taken the liberty of contacting Robert De Niro about bringing out a sister line to your product, the De Niro Nacho range. After all, a heavy weight dipping sauce needs a nacho of equal measure to stand up to the task! Pacino potato wedges and Nicholson bread sticks are in talks. But Jack is playing hardball, as per usual!
I look forward to hearing from you and getting this venture underway. Many Thanks Simon.